Blessed Chaos

Written by Gabi on . Posted in Inspiration and Appreciation, Parenting and Family Relations

light inspiration for the sou, towards enlightenment, one step at a time

Doesn’t your life sometimes feel too chaotic? Too much going on, too much to think about, too much to remember, too much to do, too much too much’s. We sometimes get so busy in the “to do” that we lose touch with the “to be”. But, even in the sometimes maddening pace of modern life, there are blessings, there is silence between the notes, starlight scattered in the darkness of the vast night sky. In my book of affirmations for enlightened being, Breathe, that is all I talk about. How do I bring the magic into the chaos? How do I bring in color to my sometimes gray-tones world? How do I shine light into corners that, until now, only held darkness

I found this home video from many years ago and was amazed at the blessed chaos of it all. Kobi is trying to recite the traditional blessings for the Jewish Shabbath (a calm thing), as our kids jump, twirl, dance, construct pyramids, and are in constant motion. I look at them, so cute, so round and chubby, so precious and small; and wonder how much of that time, in that blessed chaos, how much of that time could I see the sacredness of it all??

Then, we had pee-pee accidents every day, so many times a day; plates breaking, cups spilling at every meal; three very young, very dependent children who needed constant hand-holding. And in all of that, as you see in the video, are the two of us: Kobi and I loving each other, patiently sighing at yet another attempt to pass on to our children something we hold dear, and thinking that they are too busy moving to even notice a thing.

I watch this video, as a witness, and see Kobi pet my face, I see him kiss me, and I see what I did not while I was in the dining room in my braids. That my children saw it too. My children were actually looking as he kissed me (from the side of their eye, while spilling and knocking over a dozen things; but looking nonetheless). And when he kisses me, our youngest Solai is watching intently.

So, in all that blessed chaos we were teaching them. In our determination to carry on traditions every week; they learned to value the sacredness of traditions. In that affection between husband and wife; they learned the value of healthy relationships and affection.

So, I deeply cherish this precious glimpse into a family life I’ve quite forgotten. They grow up so fast, and you wonder, if you caught it while it was still pitter-pattering at your feet. If I could give families and intimate couples one piece of advice to remember what was, or to better see what is, it would be this:

Turn on the video camera. Record that stupid, everyday nothing stuff like putting the kids to bed, like a dinner, like a conversation the second you can tell it’s going anywhere deep or meaningful. So many people in our lives, so many precious family moments that then, I took for granted; now, I watch in video and thank God I was determined enough to record it on tape. So many very life-changing and inspiring conversations with Kobi or other dear friends in our lives, I’ve recorded. They are timeless, precious, and irreplaceable.

Desperate to see the magic happening between the four walls of your living room? Fascinated by the concept of enlightened home life? I’d like to share with you a mantra from my book, Breathe.

I know I’ve been talking about it a lot lately. It’ just that I’m so inspired by Breathe, created often by 3am flashes of inspiration over four years ago. It was a stressful time, with very young children, and lots of chaos to get done and push towards, each day anew.  Every time I open the file to get a tidbit to put on the blog; I get re-inspired (again).

Today, I have chosen Essence Thirty-Six: Time. We’re always running, racing, pushing, fighting time. Here’s another angle in which to see her.

Read it this affirmation, slowly, and often. May it empower you (and me) to see the beauty that is, now, in the time, right now, as it is, as it dances messily in our faces. Enjoy!

Essence Number Thirty-Six – Time

towards enlightenment, one step at a time

Today, I choose time.

Time has meant to me stress, overwhelm, tension, running, fitting more in, feeling pressed.

Time and I have been in a constant race in which I usually feel at a great loss.

Today, I choose to see the endearing blessing of time.

Today, I choose time.

Time is the most precious and holy gift I am given on this Earth.

Today, I shall bless my time, be grateful for my time, bring joy into my time.

Today, I realize that I am free to enjoy my time with myself, my children, the people I love.

Today, I choose time.

Today, I realize that I am free to enjoy my time, also, as I clean my home,  feed my family, and bring income to my life.

Time is my most precious commodity and I shall thank her, see her as such.

Today, I will share with my child the joyous and precious gift of time.

Today, I shall use my time to connect and relish those I love.

Today, I choose the blessing of time.

Today, I choose time.

And this song, (I love Yael Naim!), is just perfect here. Listen to these words, and how she sings it so soulfully. Brilliant!

How can you stay outside?
there’s a beautiful mess inside
how can you stay outside?
there’s a beautiful mess inside
Take a deep breath and dive
there’s a beautiful mess inside
how can you stay outside?
There’s a beautiful mess
beautiful mess inside

Oh beautiful, beautiful

Far far there’s this little girl
she was praying for something big to happen to her
every night she hears beautiful strange music
it’s everywhere there’s nowhere to hide
but if it fades she begs
“oh lord don’t take it from me, don’t take it”

She says, “I guess I’ll have to give it birth
to give it birth
I guess, I guess I have to give it birth
I guess I have to, have to give it birth
there’s a beautiful mess inside and it’s everywhere

Just look at yourself now
deep inside
deeper than you ever dared
deeper than you ever dared
there’s a beautiful mess inside
beautiful mess inside


May your time be a blessing to your soul, and may you see the blessings in your life, in that chaos, today.




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