Chronic Pain and Body Dysfunction- Falling Apart, Relearning & What Happens When you Mess With the Psoas- Part 4

This is not fun. And I was naive to think it would be fun. I thought it would be some more of my beloved Eye of the Tiger, hear me roar because I am that powerful kind of stuff. It’s not. It’s a slow, maddening being that feels like you are not doing anything. So, I have been doing a lot.

I’ve spent 3-6 hours a day relaxing my psoas and hearing an ocean of things drown me, crash me in waves that tore me to pieces. Who would think that meditating would leave me broken? I knew this from Vippasana, and thought, somehow that it would be different here. So, a couple of videos for you. They say it better than I ever could.

Falling Apart: The Storm of Emotions and Worthlessness That Pours Out When You Touch What was So Deeply Buried

AND

Relearning: The Challenge of Relearning how to Sit, Stand, Lean Over, and Walk

Falling Apart: The Storm of Emotions and Worthlessness That Pours Out When You Touch What was So Deeply Buried

I warn you now. This is tough to watch. It’s the killer headache that came with everything dysfunctional about me gushing out at 200 miles per hour. Get ready.

Relearning: The Challenge of Relearning how to Sit, Stand, Lean Over, and Walk

And a lighter glimpse into rehab. 44 seconds of it. It’s cute and it’s me trying, with the patience of my dear family around me, to figure out how it is I am meant to reinvent all that I am.

It’s part of a healing series: When Your Body Doesn’t Do What You Want It To. I’m sharing the entire journey to document it for myself (because I WILL be victorious in this battle) and to inspire others to learn, grow, face it, overcome this physical pain, that emotional deep-rooted issue, this addiction, and that insanely normal every-day family life situation.

Part One: Mommy Tummy and Other Plumbing Frustrations

Part Two: Greatfulness, Overwhelm, and Determination

Part Three: What the Hell do I do with Myself

Part Four: Falling Apart, Relearning Everything & What Happens When you Mess With the Psoas

Part Five: Overwhelm After the Confidence Wanes

PHoto credits: header photo- eXpirelife.